45% My Ass
On the radio last week, I heard a dj cite the statistic that 45% of people lie to their doctors about their health status and lifestyle choices. (Since when did John Tesh, the creepy man with huge forehead who is synonymous with the formative years of trashy gossipy 'magazine' television, become a dj on lame late night talk radio? The more worrisome part of this: Why am I listening to late night talk radio?)I sat in my personal trainer's office last nite, feeling fairly fit and badass after being forced to do some hard things with heavy weights, and answered some questions he had for me. I'm thinking: Phew! Hard work over, let's sit back and chat. WRONG.
"Do you eat well?"
"Yes!" (Confidently proud.)
"Do you eat fried foods?"
"Rarely, if ever." (Giving my best No-way-man-not-me-who-would-do-that head shake. I now fear where this conversation is headed.)
"What kinds of foods are your favorite....?"
"Oh, I really like carrots. And peanut butter. Oh and I really like bok choy. Steamed, of course. And every now and then I'll have some like lowfat yogurt or something if I'm stressed out." (Pinocchio-esque, my nose grew so far so fast that it torpedoed my water bottle and would have punctured his lung were it not for the rock solid trainer-required pectoral muscle.)
A mere 30 minutes after those words left my mouth, I was guilt freely ingesting (Exhibit A) tortilla chips with (Exhibit B) creamy sundried tomato feta cheese spread and chased that tasty app down with a mondo slice of (Exhibit C, D, and E because boy was it greasy) eggplant and goat cheese pizza.
Verdict: John Tesch needs a new fact checker. I'm willing to bet one Dick's double cheeseburger that trainer stats blow doctor stats out of the water in the They Look Me In The Eye And Shamelessly Lie department.
posted by gracegow @ 3:08 PM
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