catcall

Red Wig Event

On Friday, I was going to lunch with my co-workers Matt and Chase when we saw 2 indigent men dressed up like cowboys. Then we saw a worn down woman with a crystal ball pretending to be a gypsy. Then we saw a band of homeless people that were producing a little tap dance and a capella performance on a corner. It was a fucking circus and we were center stage. Matt's best guess was that the unusually high number of crazies in costumes! soothsaying! tapping! and singing! on the streets was because of the full moon.

Well. Hope so. At least they had an excuse.

On Saturday, I joined the ranks in cookoo-ville, at least by outward appearances. Sans celestial excuse, I soberly strutted around downtown for a little over an hour wearing a fire engine red wig, handing out flyers for the La Rousse Red Wig Event. Fyi, La Rousse means 'red headed woman' in French so thus the red wigs, oui oui?

Jen, Anna, Kerry and I canvassed the Pike/Pine shopping area pouncing on trendy potential patrons. Jen, my partner in this wiggy day, and I had fun being bona fide freaks for a while and quickly realized a few interesting things while we were in disguise:

1) We profiled pedestrians.

It may be illegal to profile at the airports, but on the sidewalks a split second judgement based solely on appearance is critical to effective flyer distribution. Wearing Keds? A polar fleece anorak? A fanny pack? If you're sporting any of this nerd alert gear, we will NOT be coming your way. Sure, underneath your fashion mis-steps could be a diva just dying to get out, but with style errors that egregious we're not takin' the time to find out. No flyer for you.

2) Frumpy people have bad attitudes, sometimes.

Human nature is such that no one wants to be left out. It didn't feel good to be that kid passed over for the kickball team in 3rd grade. And it doesn't feel good now to be passed over for receiving the La Rousse flyer. But when we walk by you in your fanny pack splendor and you see us give a flyer to a bona fide fashionista, don't come my way and sqwak WITH ATTITUDE "Give me one of those, too." The answer was, is and will be: NO. No flyer for your frumpy self OR for your attitude.

3) Wearing sunglasses helps. A lot.

Jen didn't wear sunglasses, I did. This was a key component to not feeling like a total ass when passersbye sneered at me, ignored me, leered at me or just generally interacted with me in any way. My shades were my armor, my filter, my safe place. Secret: part of me did feel just a little badass in an Alias/Jennifer Garner kind of way. Shhh.

posted by gracegow @ 7:31 PM